Jimmy must be using drugs. I really can’t afford this vacation. On and on it goes. These are the building blocks of desperation, and the foundation for the walls we build around ourselves out of fear. Does anything we fear today carry the weight it truly should? How many of us face our imminent death from an unknown quarter, even once in the long stretch of our lives, let alone on a daily basis. There are those of us who do. Those men and women who wake up each morning, and put themselves in harms way by choice, are those who stand between us and the true horrors that still lurk in our world. In doing so, they free us up to fear our next car payment, the supposed slight of a lover, the impression we will make at the company picnic. We cloak ourselves in the fear of living our lives. We see our lives not as magical gifts to be treasured, taken, emptied of every last drop of sustenance. Oh no. We see our lives as something to be endured, gotten through, to get even with. The path of. I am ready now!”I knew she was a strong woman and I had to maintain control, or I would be just like her previous men. “I’m sorry Brittany, I have work to do today. I can meet you after work, but I am busy until then.”A look of shock fell on her face. I do not think anyone had ever said something like that to her. She pulled back slightly then gave a sly smile. “Have you just said no to me?”“I didn’t say no, I said later. I will meet you after work.”I could not tell if she was shocked or mad. She hesitated, reached in her jeans pocket, pulled out a key, and said, “This is a key to my house. I will be home around six.”I gave her a kiss on the cheek and turned back around to my desk. After she left, I breathed a deep sigh of relief. She wanted a strong man. It would take all I had to show I could be that strong with her. I knew it would be worth it in the long run.I arrived at her house thirty minutes early. I wanted to have everything ready when she got home. Her house was in a gated.
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